Friday, September 14, 2007

Funny Pick-up Lines as Conversation Starters with Girls



Initiating a conversation with an attractive woman is not always an easy task. In fast, it can be quite intimidating to a lot of guys. No, this article is not going to provide you with some humorous pick-up lines to use with women. Actually, listen to me closely when I say this- do NOT use funny pick-up lines!

Does the following situation sound familiar?
You see an attractive woman standing with her friends. You want to meet her, but you have no idea what to say. So, you take the advice of your friends and use one of their funny pick-up lines. However, rather than engaging further in conversation, she turns the other way in disgust.

If you still haven't figured out what happened above, I will tell you. It was an poorly chosen conversation starter. Funny pick-up lines are not effective conversation starters with girls. You may find them funny, but they do not work with women. Instead, you should try a more natural way to initiate conversation when trying to meet women.

The goal is to avoid sounding tacky or cheesy. Below, I describe four ways you can initiate a conversation in a manner that comes across more naturally and not so "obvious."

First
, a great way to start a conversation is to focus on a situation or event. Situational conversation starters are terrific ways to use the environment at the time to engage in conversation with a woman.

For example, if you notice a couple arguing and she spills a drink on him, you can go up to a woman nearby and joke about how great a couple they are together. Say something like, "wow, what a close relationship they have."

Secondly, a cliche pick-up line is far different from a genuine compliment. Complimentary pick-up lines are effective because woman love flattery and will be less likely to "walk away in disgust" after you just complimented her.

Keep in mind, though, that you should compliment a woman on something other than her looks. If she is attractive, she has probably heard similar compliments many times. Rather, try complimenting her on her fashion style or her dancing skills. The point is to make the compliment appear genuine and natural.

Third, just be yourself and act normally. Approaching a woman with confidence in your own personality and abilities will set you apart from the crowd. Your straightforward, natural approach may impress her far more than you anticipate, especially if guys continue to stick by the corny pick-up lines.

Finally
, there is always the cocky-funny approach. It is, actually, a great way to meet women and build the attraction further. This method was created by David DeAngelo and involves approaching a woman with a slightly arrogant attitude while also trying to make her laugh.

The reasoning behind this approach is to build yourself up so that she wants to work for your attention, and you can do this by using opportunities in the conversation to tease her. It is effective because your intentions are not obvious. You give the impression that you are just focused on enjoying the conversation and making her laugh.

Now, funny pick-up lines may actually her laugh, but they really are not the best choice of conversation starters with girls. The next time you are trying to meet a woman, opt for one of the four methods above. You will find that they are much more effective at meeting women.

Three Tips to Cure Shyness Around Women




If you find that you become shy around women, I bring you good news. Shyness around women can be cured with little effort.

Shyness is the main reason many guys never try to attract a woman or approach them. Their shyness virtually paralyzes them to the point that they never make a move while other guys leave with the attractive women.

But, this can change for the better. Here are three tips to cure shyness around women and help you become that confident guy any woman wants:

Tip 1: Eliminate Your Expectations


One reason guys become nervous around women is because they focus too much on the outcome of the interaction. They place too many expectations on what they hope to achieve, whether it is getting her phone number or going on a date.

Rather than focus on the outcome, just enjoy the conversation and company. Relax. Do not worry about whether or not she is into you. Just appreciate that you are talking to her and have a good time.

When you feel yourself becoming nervous, just repeat in your mind that you really do not care what happens. It would be great if you got her number, but it would not be the worst thing ever if you didn't. Like I said, just have fun. The last thing you want her to see is how nervous you are.

Tip 2: Know What You Want


I really am not contradicting myself. Yes, I told you in the first tip to remove all expectations and now I am suggesting you figure out exactly what you want.

The difference is that you need a plan of action. This is far different from removing your expectations of the outcome. Always know what outcome you want to occur, just do not dwell on it during the conversations.

Ask yourself: What do I want to come from talking to her? Do I just want to have a good time? Do I want to secure a date? Or become intimate with her? The better you can answer these questions and know what you want, the more comfortable you will feel at shifting the conversation to make it happen.

Tip 3: Just Go For It!

Practice is the best way to cure shyness around women. Knowing what you want, as I recommended above, makes it a lot easier to go for it when you have the opportunity.

If you still find that you are nervous when talking to women, my advice is to just keep practicing. With practice, you will eventually feel more comfortable and less nervous around women.

As with any skill, learning to become comfortable approaching women is something that must be practiced. Practice your conversation skills so you can determine what works and what does not work. You will gradually build your confidence and soon wonder why you were ever shy around women. Once women start picking up on your new confident personality, they will find you even more attractive.

Paying attention to these three tips will, eventually, reduce your shyness. With a little effort, you can be that guy taking home the beautiful woman!

How to Initiate Sexual Contact with Women and Why This Works




So, you are on a date with a beautiful woman. The conversation is good, but it is getting late and you are facing the challenge of closing the deal. Don't worry. You are not the only guy in that situation. Actually, many guys find that closing the deal with a woman is challenging.

There are a few steps you must cover before you can reach this stage, though. Obviously, the first thing you need to do is to make sure she is attracted to you. Her body language can be a good sign as to whether or not she is attracted. Second, it is very important that you begin gaining her trust and increasing her comfort level with you so she will go back with you to your place. Third, you must transition from conversation to initial sexual contact to move things in the right direction towards sex.

Now, let's imagine you have successfully made it through steps one and two. She is, definitely, attracted to you and is already back at your place. You can now join the many guys who are good at getting a woman back to their house. Congratulations! But, many guys are lost when it comes to the third step of initiating sexual contact.

Does this sound familiar? Or, maybe you are just hoping to avoid this situation. Well, I will let you in on a secret. Initiate sexual contact with this one simple move...KISS her! Yes, that's it. This is the only way you can transition from conversation to more physical and sexual contact.

However, this is not to say that you should just start kissing her the moment she enters your home. Not only will this approach backfire, you will likely ruin any trust and comfort level you have managed to establish thus far. You must do a few things first to ensure that the rest of the date goes smoothly.

First, we need to go back and focus on the trust factor
. By the time she gets back to your place, you should already have started to build some trust but at this stage you need to maintain it. Obviously, she already trusts you enough to come back to your house. For most women, entering our house adds to her trust since it helps assure her that you are "normal."

You do need to get her to your place, though, and the best way to do this is to keep things casual with no pressure. Remember, during the date you are trying to build her trust and too much pressure at this point will have the opposite effect. Try casually talking about something at your house, maybe something you collect or recently purchased, and mention that you would like her to see it.

When you get to your place, be sure to mention that you will show her quickly but that she doesn't need to stay long. Say something like, "It will only take a couple minutes, so you won't have to stay long. But, I would love to show you." This takes the pressure off her and helps her relax. The last thing you want to do is make her uncomfortable, since she is probably already subconsciously aware of what you are really up to.

This approach works well because it eases her mind by giving her a clear reason why she is entering your home. It also makes her feel like you are not expecting her stay. Again, your goal at this point is to make her feel more comfortable and relaxed about coming back to your place. Even if she is a little suspicious of your real goal, this at least gives her a pretense for initially coming over.

Once she is in your home you must continue to increase her comfort level and build that trust you have already started. Again, you need to keep things light and casual. Give her a brief tour of your house and show her some things around the house, maybe your movie or music collection. These can also be great items to help keep the conversation flowing if you find yourself stumbling.

Once you sense that she is more comfortable, you are now ready to show her what she originally came over to see. However, you must plan ahead by following the tips below:

* Make sure what you are looking at is in your bedroom. This means that your microwave or refrigerator is not a good choice!

* Have some back-up items in your bedroom in the event the conversation starts to simmer and you run out of things to talk about. Here's an idea: Make sure you have a CD player in your bedroom and tell her you want her to here one of your "favorite songs." Like I said, movies and music can really help a conversation along.

* Do not provide chairs in your bedroom for her to sit on, but rather only have a bed. This will help with the logistics of planning your move.

Okay. The time has come. Go ahead and show her what you "wanted her to see" and be sure to keep the conversation going for at least fifteen minutes and maybe a little longer if possible which is why the back-up items mentioned above can be helpful. Once she is more comfortable and relaxed, you can now initiate the kiss.

Do not be nervous or shy at this point. Remember, she has already shown you she is interested by coming over. The best approach to initiating the kiss is to just go for it. If this direct approach will not work for some reason, try showing her something with the goal in mind of moving closer to her at which point you should kiss her. Once you have initiated the sexual contact, let things take their course and gradually move past the first kiss and move your way closer to sex.

You can see that it is very important that you take some time to build her trust and comfort level. A little patience can payoff in the end. This system is a great way to initiate sexual contact. It shows you how to build and maintain her trust, increase her comfort level and show her that you are a fun guy. Ultimately, this helps you get her into the right mindset towards sex.

Conversation Topics Women Always Love




Unlike popular opinion, it's actually pretty easy to approach women and initiate a conversation. The problem is being able to continue the conversation and get them interested in what you have to say. As you probably know, once you run out of things to say, the conversation is finished!

So what's the solution?

Well the truth is it's simple to find topics of conversation. All you have to do ask a woman a few questions about herself then relate them to stories from your own life.

Here's how this process works...

As you probably know, women LOVE interesting and funny stories. You can take advantage of this trait by relating events from your past and tie them to her own experiences. And the best way to get started is to craft your own stories.

No matter what your life has been like at this point, you've probably have a least a few interesting stories. What you want to do is craft at LEAST 4-5 stories from your past experiences. The important thing is to put a humorous and higher status slant on each story.

A great story should follow the same format and presentation as a great joke. Here is a great method for crafting a story:

* The main character should be you

* During the story you should demonstrate basic traits like confidence, courage, and chivalry

* It should be told in humorous manner

* There should be a 'punch-line' or conclusion to the story which provides an interesting ending

Obviously your goal is to craft these stories WELL before you meet women. In fact, practice them enough so you can build drama and humor each time you tell them.

Now when you're talking to a woman, you can literally 'fish' for conversation topics. Simply ask women questions about her background and interests. Then look for topics which you can relate to one of your stories. All you have to do is demonstrate the common thread between your experiences and her life.

This type of conversation works well because you're relating something from your own life to something she has done. Furthermore if you tell your story well, you can demonstrate core traits like humor and high status.

In addition, since you're making a connection to a shared interest, it'll increase your chances of developing rapport. It's human nature to like people who are similar to ourselves. So a woman will like you because your stories will show how much you have in common.

So if you want to increase your conversation success, then I recommend you craft a few interesting stories from your own life. Then when you first meet a woman, you can latch on to her experiences and relate them to the exciting things you've done in your life.

Are You Displaying Beta Male Traits Around Women?


One of the core principles to attracting women is to learn how to become an Alpha Male. By demonstrating this personality, you'll transform yourself into somebody who can display confidence in a quiet, but noticeable manner.

Now I'm sure you've heard a lot about acting like an Alpha Male. But there is one problem with trying to accomplish this. Since you know that alpha males are the guys who can attract women, how do you know if you're acting like an alpha or if you're a beta?

Well it's simple!

There are certain identifiable characteristics which can quickly show when a guy is acting like either an alpha or beta male. Your job is to figure out if you're showing any of beta male traits, then work hard to change them.

For instance you should find out if you display any of these "beta male body language" cues:

1) Nervousness in your hands


What you do with your hands tells people a lot about your personality. So be sure not to display any beta male signals with your hands. This can include:

* Shredding napkins or playing with items

* Sitting on or hiding your hands

* Trembling or nervous energy with your hands

* Playing or twiddling with your fingers

* Biting your fingers or chewing on your fingers

2) Approval seeking

A beta male is somebody who is constantly seeking approval from other people. He is the guy who tells jokes in the hopes that others will find him funny. Or he is the guy who works hard to make people like him. In essence, the behavior of the beta male is somebody who will do anything to "fit in" with the crowd.

3) Following others

The final beta male characteristic is looking to others for guidance and self respect. In a social setting, he is the guy who is constantly following the trends as a way to fit in and become cool. In essence, he has no personality of his own. Instead he is the guy who follows his friends or "what's cool" to define who he is as a person.

As you can see, there are a lot of traits which can make a beta male. What's important is to look within yourself and find out if you're displaying ANY of these characteristics. If you discover that you are, then I recommend you take steps to quickly eradicate them.

PROMISE WOMEN FANTASY, ADVENTURE, AND THE FORBIDDEN




Most women feel they have constricted roles in life. They have to go to a job they find boring and dislike, go home to their television, and are mired in dull routine. They are supposed to be the “moralizing” force on society and not think about anything but plain vanilla sex.

But women long to play a different role than society allows them to.

Women secretly long for romantic rebellion, for a chance to become irrational and uncivilized. Women are dying to be overwhelmed with emotions, to let go of their usual routine. They hunger for something more out of life, something grand, something like the adventure and romance they read about in books as young children.

And deep down women are actually excited and intrigued by guilty, transgressive pleasures. Women are not the sweet, innocent creatures that some men would like to imagine them to be. Like men, they are deeply attracted to the forbidden and the dangerous.

The seducer knows that women are waiting for adventure and sexual pleasure. Women never get enough of it from friends and lovers, and they cannot get it by themselves. The seducer knows that women want more illusion, fantasy, play, and forbidden sex. He knows that they want to participate in something rare and thrilling.

You can play on this dream of women by promising a fantasy world of escape and pleasure, by creating the picture inside her head of a fantastic future in which you’ll whisk her away to.

Talk about adventure and travel, and have your apartment a place dedicated to pleasure and play where she feels transported away from the world of work and responsibility.

Do NOT talk of work, duties, judgments, or reality. Instead, offer the rare thrill of losing herself in the moment, where her five senses come alive and her mind is left behind. If you sell them pleasure and adventure, an escape from their dull reality, women will happily follow you.

Be that man that promises women that forbidden and thrilling adventure of pleasure and passion.

Be the Charismatic that lifts her thoughts up into the clouds.

Be the Lover who promises them unsurpassed sexual and romantic passion.

Be the Rake who insinuates the sexually forbidden and the dangerous.

Be the Natural who has that ease around women that makes them comfortable and want to follow you to the ends of the earth.

HOW TO MAKE WOMEN LAUGH



A lot of guys ask me how to be funny. After all, women all the time say they want to meet a guy who “makes them laugh”. The trick to being funny is forget “funny” and just be playful. If you’re playful, a girl will laugh. And the reason girls want to laugh is because they want to feel easy COMFORT around you. And one of the easiest ways to being playful is role play silly little fantasies in your conversations with a girl.

To give you an idea of what I’m talking about, here are some playful role playing interactions that I had on the phone with a girl.


OLIVE OIL BATH

Sabrina: "yeah I like to take showers. So can you take me to a little shower fantasy"

Derek: "Sure, but we’d use olive oil instead of water. Olive oil is good for your skin right?"

Sabrina: "I think so-"

Derek: "Yeah, but olive oil won’t come through the pipes so I’d make you sit in the tub and I dump buckets of warm, hot olive oil down your back."

Sabrina: "hmmmm"

Derek: "And slowly the tub would fill up with olive oil... and that warmth would spread all throughout your body... and then we’d jump out and our skin would be all oily and shiny"

Sabrina: "lol"

Derek: "And we’d leave olive oil footprints all over the floor as we ran around butt-naked trying to clean it up."

Sabrina: "lol. Yeah, but why waste all that olive oil when we could make a salad out of it?"

Derek: "Smart thinking, we’d dumped 40 heads of lettuce in there, a few tomatoes, a few onions, and we’d have enough Caesar salad to feed an army."

Sabrina: "lol"

See how I’m just making a rather ridiculous little story for her? And notice how it has a sexual connotation to it. When you wrap a sexual story in playfulness, women are not nearly as likely to resist it.


GREEK POOL PARTY FANTASY

Derek: "So what’s your house like"

Sabrina: "I’ve got a pool in the back"

Derek: "Awesome! We can throw pool parties back there..."

Sabrina: "pool parties? uh-"

Derek: "Or better yet, I’ll dress up like Zeus and you dress up like Athena and we’ll be like gods and goddesses hanging out at the pool"

Sabrina: "lol yes! I like that"

Derek: "And we’ll fill the pool up with olive oil and get all greasy. And crush grapes with our feet. It will rock."

Sabrina: "lol"

Derek: "Yeah... and we need to get a servant to hold up one of those huge Hossanah leaves and fan us down"

Sabrina: "Yeah... and I’ll blast the air conditioner so it goes out the window into the pool."

Derek: "Damn, you’re good at this aren’t you..."

Notice how I have her laughing. Am I cracking canned jokes? No. Am I racking my brain to be funny? No. The silliness and laughter comes naturally from the playful fantasy.


THE SEDONA VORTEX ANGELS

Sabrina: "Yeah, I felt a spiritual connection on top of the vortex in Sedona."

Derek: "Yeah, the most interesting thing happened to me while I stood on top the vortex.... ....I was standing up there and lo and behold my cell phone rings! Yeah, it was like the angels were phoning me!!"

Sabrina: "lol"

Derek: "Yeah, and what really shocked me was that I get perfect reception on top of a mountain vortex in the middle of nowhere yet I can’t get good reception in my own apartment. What’s up with that??"

Sabrina: "lol... yeah it’s terrible"

Derek: "Anyway, I get the phone and the angels start talking to me..."

Sabrina: "What did they tell you"

Derek: "You won’t believe this, but they gave me the secret of the meaning to life"

Sabrina: "Really? And what is the secret of the meaning to life"

Derek: "That can be yours for the low price of only $499.95!"

Sabrina: "lol that’s all?"

Derek: "Well, if you knew the secret, you wouldn’t think it was worth much more than that either--"

Sabrina: "lol... no, but didn’t you notice how commercial it is in Sedona?"

Derek: "Yeah... it’s like you can walk down from the vortex having had this incredible spiritual experience and walk right into McDonalds and... SUPER SIZE YOUR FRIES!!!"

Sabrina: "hahahahaha"

So be PLAYFUL and you’ll be funny. Be PLAYFUL and she’ll laugh. Be PLAYFUL and she’ll relax. Get the idea?

Tuesday, September 11, 2007

I completely reject the frame that you need a hot car to be





Ok guys, today I want to reveal a little secret about the seduction
industry.

A lot of guys think the seduction industry is about ebooks, CDs,
website articles and workshops.

I have news for you. It isn't. These things aren't even one percent
of the industry. They're not even a tenth of a percent.

The real market isn't about Mystery, Neil Strauss, Lance, or Derek.

The real market is about Lexus, Porshe, Mustang, and Mercedes. And
no, I'm not listing the names of strippers here.

I'm talking about automobiles. The biggest market built around
seduction in the world in general - and the U.S. in particular - is
the automobile market.

Think about this - the first introduction most U.S. teenagers have
into the world of sex is through a car.

After all, most teens live in a world so cut up by snakes of grey
asphalt that the car is the ONLY way to get around. Hell, it almost
seems like the dominant life form on Earth, leaving any young man
without a car to a life of loneliness and isolation.

Don't have a ride? How are you going to get some alone time with
that girl... by bus? While your mom drives in the front seat? I don't
think so.

In fact, for anyone who lives in the suburbs and in most cities,
the car isn't just nice, it's an absolute necessity.

Now take that need and plug it into our world where capitalism
reigns king and corporate big-wigs try to squeeze out every last
dollar. You think they won't try to tap into every guy's basic need
to get laid?

Suddenly, just having any old car isn't enough. You've got to have
a muscle car, a Mustang. Or better yet, something which flashes
your cash around, like a BMW. Otherwise, you're not adventurous.
You're not successful. You won't get the best girls. Advertising
tells us so.

Automobiles are a multi-billion dollar industry which supports a
multi-million dollar ad industry all by itself. Car print and TV
ads try to tell us we need that $600 dollar monthly payment in
order to be hot studs.

Humans don't have feathers. So from the time that we're kids, the
ad industry indoctrinates expensive cars onto us as our must-have
peacocking gear.

Many guys wind up developing a fascination with cars and
accessories. While that may have to do with aesthetics or
performance or the joys of being a gearhead, underlying everything
is still one basic desire - the desire to get laid.

I completely reject the frame that you need a hot car to be
successful with women.

I see guys working their asses off, spending ALL their income on
some hot car (and living at their mom's as a result), and you know
what?

It doesn't get them anywhere with women or make them happy!

Now, a lot of guys ask me what do *I* drive and what cars would I
recommend?

I drive a 10 year old Ford Escort with about 160,000 miles on it.

That's right. It's my SS Mobile (Seduction Science, baby).

You want to listen to music? You have to punch the on/off button
about 10 times before the radio comes alive.

There's some ominous clicking from one side of the car as it drives
(my mechanic says it's harmless).

Worse, the car is an awful aqua green color. And going up hills can
be a real bitch. Sometimes, the car feels like it's working with
about 50 horsepower.

Oh, I almost forgot, the top of my head touches the ceiling when I
sit in it. Getting out, I look like a clown doing shtick with one
of those tiny clown cars.

You can imagine, I get a lot of comments about the SS Mobile from
chicks - after all, they've been indoctrinated in the same system
that sells to men. But you know what? In the end, they don't care.

After all, I don't take the car into bars with me, or out on the
dance floor. By the time they see the SS Mobile, I've already
created attraction and an aura of high social value around myself.

In other words, a car can't help you in most situations, and by the
time a girl sees it she'll already have an established belief about
your social worth. If your social value is already high to the
girl, your car isn't going to be much of a factor whatsoever.

In fact, your auto has about 1% to do with your success if you
develop your other skills.

That doesn't mean you have to drive a piece of crap - you don't
need to prove a point like I do.

You can still drive cheap but SMART.

Your car CAN be a peacocking tool.

When you look at the road, everyone is cocooned in their cars. You
can't see any faces. If you think about it, the road looks like an
alien landscape devoid of humans.

But what about a convertible? Now you're out in the open for all to
see. Everyone wants to see who's driving - as humans, we've evolved
to scan for eyes and faces and look. And when you're the only face
in a crowd of impersonal metal, you get plenty of attention.

Or take the Jeep Wrangler. Not only is your face out in the open,
now your entire BODY is out in the open. Very hypnotic. Plus,
unlike a convertible, you're sitting up HIGH. People have to look
UP to you - which is very trancy and sexy to girls.

A Jeep also conveys a sense of adventure and rebelliousness -
without going so far as painting your car electric orange or
getting ghetto rims.

I also recommend buying something used. You can probably find an
older car, for instance, for under $5000 and it will get the same
job done.

Buy smart. Don't let the millions spent on advertising and the
trance put out by corporate automobilia hook and swindle ya. They
pay millions of dollars to advertisers and psychologists in an
utterly massive and highly planned and organized effort to do just
that.

Focus on building YOURSELF, your internals through programs like
the Deep Inner Game listening sessions, not your car. Look
outside the Matrix of "what you're supposed to do" that the
business planners have constructed for you.

Thanks for letting me get that off my chest!

Science Keeping a Beautiful Woman- Honesty IS the Best Policy


If you want your woman to be sexually wild and responsive to you in
bed, it's necessary to be radically honest with your woman, with
your feelings, with your present activities, and with your future
plans.

If your dream is to have a threesome with her, you need to tell
her. If you want her to learn to deep throat you, you need to tell
her.

But more than that, being honest about any negative feelings you
have serves a valuable purpose in a relationship. Your expression
of negative feelings can alert your woman to any adjustments that
need to be made. And her being honest with you allows you to make
the appropriate adjustments too.

In other words, a man and woman who are honest with each other can
identify problems in the relationship very quickly and can dispose
of them very quickly.

But if you're dishonest with your woman, problems will emerge, and
fast.

For instance, if you want to have a sexual experience with another
woman, and you keep it bottled up inside, eventually you may be
driven to sneaking around, getting caught, causing emotional pain,
and losing all trust in the relationship.

But if you communicate your desires (and one of the best ways is to
use my communication scripts in my Blissnosis program), you'll be
able to work out a solution with your woman... perhaps hooking up a
threesome together.

Or imagine your woman loves to cook for you as an expression of her
love. Unfortunately, she's an awful cook - the burgers are soggy,
the buns are stale, and the broccoli is tough like hard tack. Not
to mention you're on a diet and can't eat hamburgers.

But because you appreciate her effort to cook, you don't say
anything and just eat and suffer in silence. Soon however, you
come to dread visiting her and eating her terrible food, and you
start to make up reasons not to visit her. The relationship
suffers.

The relationship suffers because the dishonesty causes the other
person to be ignorant, when they could be doing something to remedy
the situation.

Or suppose your woman feels like she's getting overweight. You're
concerned as well, but you decide not to say or do anything because
you don't want her to feel uncomfortable. You might even think
that a few extra pounds isn't such a big deal really. So she makes
no effort to lose the weight, and then she gains a few more.
Pretty soon, you become increasingly displeased with her
unattractive figure, but you continue to bite your tongue.

And pretty soon your dishonesty and keeping your feelings bottled
up inside becomes a habit. And without accurate information, the
unhappy situation goes on and on.

And slowly but surely you grow apart from your woman because your
needs were not being met, all because you weren't honest with her
about what your needs were.

Sometimes we use dishonesty to protect our woman from the pain of
criticism. But you do her no favors when you tell her "protective"
lies to make her feel more secure and loved. Eventually exactly
the opposite happens.

But for most guys they just need to stop acting like a wuss and get
a backbone, especially when it comes to their sexual needs and
fantasies being fulfilled.

You need to stop worrying about losing the relationship and go
after what you want. In the long run, your relationship will be
much healthier for it and your woman and you will be much happier
when your needs are met.

Of course, you don't want to confuse honesty with making demands,
disrespect, or anger. If you want her to dress sexy for you, don't
pout like a child, beg like a wuss, or demand like a bully to
communicate your needs.

And angry outbursts won't get your woman to listen and adapt to
your needs, they'll only send her running for cover at your tone of
brutal selfishness.

Honesty is simply reporting what your needs are without begging,
pouting, outbursts, judgments, or demands.

AND LET'S NOT FORGET... POSITIVE HONESTY!

And remember, being honest with your woman is not just for the bad
moments or for bad the behaviors, but also for REINFORCING the good
moments and good behaviors.

90% of your "honest moments" should be for REWARDING her GOOD
behaviors.

Whenever she does something that makes you feel good, TELL HER! If
you express your positive feelings clearly and enthusiastically,
you'll make her feel good, reinforcing the good behavior and
linking even more positive feelings to you.

Thursday, August 30, 2007

Three Types of Seduction Techniques


Seduction techniques that men use to attract women they desire will vary from man to man, also most men will vary their seduction techniques depending on how they perceive the women they are trying to seduce.

In this article I am going to talk about three seduction techniques that most men usually fall in.

Charm/Flattery/ Technique- Most everyone should be familiar with this particular seduction technique as many men have been led to believe this is the most effective way to get a girl. Just in case you are not familiar with this seduction technique I will explain it.

A man using this seduction technique will flatter and a compliment a girl from the beginning and offer to take her places and in general spend a lot of money on her in the hopes that she will return his favors with some type of romantic affection.

In my opinion this is the weakest and least effective seduction technique that a man can try and use on a woman. Generally this seduction technique tells a woman that you have nothing of real value to offer her besides your money and if you're not in the high 6 or 7 figure income bracket your money isn't going to hold much value with a beautiful woman.




Hypnosis/NLP Seduction Technique- A majority of the books on Seduction will usually include some form of this seduction technique in there books. A variety of patterns and scripts that are designed to have women experience feelings of sexual excitement, attraction, and just about anything else that you want her to experience is the strength of this seduction technique. Now this technique works extremely well IF and I emphasize the word IF you have the self-confidence and congruency that is required to make it work; not to mention gaining rapport with her in the first place. Many of the books and programs that teach this as a seduction technique fall short in truly explaining and teaching you this method. If as a man you hold the belief that you can't attract women and deserve women of high quality then purchasing a book or program that simply teaches you the seduction techniques of Hypnosis/NLP without changing your beliefs will be worthless.

ALPHA Male- More a way of life than a seduction technique, Alpha Male attracts and gets beautiful women because he knows that he deserves and expects quality beautiful women in his life. He might give gifts or even run patterns or scripts on the women in his life to create a sense of complete and total satisfaction in there life because this is what he has CHOSEN to do. At all times the choice is his because he has worked on his beliefs and inner-game so much that he knows it is his choice and his reality. Once you begin to realize the choice is your attracting women no longer because a matter of choosing the best seduction technique only a matter of choosing who.

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

Art Of Approaching Review - Is This Your Way To Meet Beautiful Women



There are literally hundreds of dating guides out there. But most of them are complete rubbish and contribute nothing to you. I know, I read a great deal of them.

The Art Of Approaching Women is an online pickup, dating, and seduction guide, written by seduction master, Joseph Mathews. But is it any different from all those useless dating guides? Does it give any real benefit to guys who want to become better at approaching, attracting, and seducing women?

There's no doubt that this guide has a lot of useful information about how to manipulate the mind of women and to get them more attracted to you regardless of your age, looks, and financial status.

This guide is very extensive, too much so in fact. You just drown in useful tips, tricks, secret opening lines, body language guidelines and manipulation methods, and much more. It takes a while to take it all in.

Here's what you can learn from this guide:

1. How to approach women with ease

2. What to say to gether instantly attracted to you.

3. How to get one night stands

4. How to break free of the 'Friend Zone'

5. How to seduce women even if they're not available.

6. How to appear more charismatic and attractive and get people to hit on you

7. Much much more.

This guide is for real. It holds true and useful information which actually made me shake my head in amazement when I first read it. I remembered all the stupid mistakes I was to make with women and just couldn't believe the fool I once was.

However, this guide isn't for everyone. It isn't a magical cure. It can show you the way but you will have to walk through it. I mean that if you're not willing to learn and apply what this guide has to teach you, don't waste your time. You don't want it enough. However, if you are willing to put in some time, than this guide can really transform your dating and sex life around.

Personally, I recommend the advanced version of this guide. It's much more expensive, but it's worth it because it can turn you into a mega seduction master. If you don't want to spend so much, the regular guide is still great.

How to Pick Up a Girl - The Art of the Pickup



Most guys marry the sixth woman they've dated, on average. I think I read that in some authoritative journal (or The National Enquirer -- my memory fails me). Few guys have the time or resources to really master their relations with the opposite sex. Those who try often seek out information online like "How to Pick Up Hot Girls and Get Laid Fast". Most are disappointed with the seduction method they find.

Internet Newsgroups are another source of information
on the subject of seduction, but too many are inhabited by troublemakers, clueless newbies and predatory marketers. Very few of the seduction methods touted there come from guys who've walked-the-walk. The biggest moderated, free seduction discussions are at Fast Seduction 101, which began in 1999 as an attempt to make sure posts to alt.seduction.fast were archived permanently for future reference.

About three years ago, I exchanged emails with Jay "Formhandle" Valens of Fast Seduction 101. I was exploring the idea of participating in seminars as a speaker, and he mentioned a couple of projects he was developing. One was a user-rated seminar program that based its fees on actual usefulness. The other was seduction information products that were a quantum leap above the then current crop of eBooks, CD's and DVD's on the subject.

The problem many guys have with learning a seduction method is how it's presented. Some guys just don't respond well to reading about it. They want a demonstration, preferably one they can go over again and again. That's the problem with books and live seminars. Neither offers that "instant replay" of an interaction in real time.

If you're hunting around for the right product for yourself, consider which is better for you: reading a book or .PDF, listening to a seminar or pickup attempt on a CD, or watching (and listening to) a video of the same information being used in real time.

Knowing your own best strategy for learning will save you time and money when you decide to invest in a seduction method.

There’s a ton of information on seduction online. Some of it’s good, most of it’s a waste of your time. If you really want to know how to pick up a girl, follow the lead of a guy who’s been an active leader in the Seduction Community since 1999, and knows how to pick up a beautiful woman. There’s no “magic secret” to it – just a proven set of steps you can begin to master RIGHT NOW.

Saturday, August 25, 2007

How to Deal With Dominant Women - Take Control in the Dating Game


It can be a guy's worst nightmare having to deal with a dominant woman and feeling being controlled. Once you fall into a dominant woman's trap it's very hard to make your point count. It's more like she makes all the decisions for you and you simply have to follow. Some men are infatuated by dominate females but at the end they realize they’re at the receiving point of constant insults and find it hard to say no. So the trick here is not to let a woman dominate you in the dating game, you need to make her realize who wears bigger pants and who should be in control.

Get your word out- Learn to use the word no more often, do not fall into her trap and don't let her dominate you. Once a woman gets used to a guy with low self esteem she would never ever show respect for you again no matter how tough you get afterwards. Dominate her before she dominates you.

Don't be a chicken- Learn to make decisions and learn to lead not to follow. Be strong enough to make decisions and stick to them. Be a guy with a strong back bone and do not always look for advice from other people to justify your decisions.

Don't ask for permissions- Some men are so drawn into a certain woman that they keep asking for permission for every second thing they do. Constant asking for permissions and justifications degrades your image in front of the woman and she would show less respect for you. Learn to take firm certain decisions and don't always second guess or look for other opinions; learn to drive rather than being driven all the time.

Challenge your weaknesses- You might have some weaknesses just like any other human being but learn to challenge them and don't give anyone a chance to make fun of you based on your weaknesses. Learn to appreciate and respect yourself for the way you are and learn to take pride in yourself. No one can dominate you unless you give your personal consent. Women normally dominate men who constantly talk about how weak they are and what they lack, specially the one's who ask for approvals and are always tentative about everything they do. Therefore learn to be decisive and learn to take a stand for yourself.

How To Talk To Women


There are many incidents where questions will be thrown to you or your friends. How to talk to women so that you can get them attracted to you?

Just by using the right words, you can definitely create an impression that makes women attracted to you. But the key is also to understand what the women wants in the conversation.

Many a times when a guy goes up to a woman, he is thinking of what he can get when the woman gets attracted to him. By doing this, you are preventing her from talking to you! You have to consider her feelings when you are talking to her.

A woman is very sensitive to words. When you praise her at the right times, she will feel happy and appreciated about it, and thus attraction will be created in this instance. But praising just for the sake of praising is just plain irritating, and it just shows that you are a needy man.

So first of all, you have to capture her feelings. Make to her to feel emotional to your words. When a guy starts talking to a woman and able to trigger her feelings towards you through your actions and words, you have already won half the battle.

By doing so, you make her feels so good when talking to you that she probably won’t be able to forget you for the rest of her life.

Next you have to also be good at your language as well. She must be able to understand what you are trying to say in order to be attracted by you. Therefore don’t try to pick up women who don’t speak the same language!

You don’t have to be a professional speaker but make sure she can feel and understand what you are talking about.

Remember women are very sensitive to words especially from men!

How To Get A Girlfriend - 4 Sure-Fire Tips For You


How to get a girlfriend? Is it really that hard? There are many single men out there who are looking for their ideal women who they can spend the rest of their lives with. But before you can talk about marriage, the first question will be how to get a girlfriend first?

There are many reasons you have troubles looking for a girlfriend. Now you can find out some tips that you can use to getting yourself a girlfriend.

Tips #1: Be Attractive


Before you can start thinking of getting a beautiful girlfriend or have multiple dates with different women, you must have the following skills to impress and to make women pay attention to you.

Below are some of the points that you should have or improve on:

- Confidence
- Dare to approach women
- High rejection threshold
- Good conversation skills
- Able to create rapport with women
- Know how to seduce women

Tips #2: Find the Type of Women That You Fancy

No one else except you knows what kind of women and what type of personality you like. Therefore before you choose your girlfriend, you must consider if she is someone that you can spend the rest of your life with. So consider about her family background, age, education etc.

Tips #3: Know Where to Find Her

This may sound crappy but it is definitely important. Based on the type of women that you like, you have to go to the appropriate places to find them. For example, if you like your girlfriend to be a clubber, you should go to the disco clubs to find her. If you like her to be someone who reads a lot, you might want to try your luck at the library.

Tips #4: Date Multiple Women

It will never be the case where you will find the one that suits you in just one date or with just one woman. Therefore date different women and see which type of girls suits you.

From all these dates, you will be able to find out what you really want from your potential girlfriend.

To learn how you can effectively approach any woman, anywhere and know exactly what to say to her, visit the website below for more information

Seduction Techniques Revealed

There are a wide range of seduction techniques out there. Different gurus have different methods and systems, but which seduction techniques really work? Let me share with you some of the methods that form the foundation of creating sexual attraction.

Body language is often overlooked but in my opinion it is one of the most potent seduction techniques available. Over 90% of our communication is non-verbal, so you'd be placing yourself at a disadvantage if you choose to ignore this element.

Your body language needs to communicate confidence above all else. Time and time again women have rated confidence as the most attractive quality in a man.

To communicate confidence follow a few simple rules. Make sure that your posture is upright and strong, make and keep eye contact and do not play with your fingers - rings and clothing in particular. A final tip is to claim your space, not in an exaggerated manner but in a comfortable and natural way.

Another seduction technique is to use the power of touch, in pick up circles this is know as Kino. The purpose of Kino is to create both attraction and comfort, the key to using this technique effectively is to be discreet.

Kino should occur as a natural element of an interaction; Light touches on the hands, forearm and shoulders are generally acceptable. Ensure that you do not draw attention to what you are doing i.e by looking at the area that you're touching - Kino needs to flow and feel natural.

There are many more effective seduction techniques, but with limited space I have only been able to briefly expose two simple principles with you. Seduction techniques work and will take your success with women to the next level.

Speed Seduction Revealed

Speed Seduction is a method for generating attraction developed by Ross Jeffries. It's origins are in a self published mail order book, but it's success has spawned numerous products across a wide range of media.

Speed Seduction is based upon the language patterns of clinical hypnotist Milton Erickson. Considered by many to be the greatest clinical hypnotist of all time, Erickson was renowned for creating positive changes in his patients within just one session of hypnosis.

Unlike traditional hypnotherapy, Ericksons' therapy involved inducing trance through conversational indirect hypnosis. His language patterns and methods were identified by Richard Bandler and John Grinder who used it as one of the foundations of NLP.

The core theory of Speed Seduction is that female attraction has an emotional basis. To build attraction a man must communicate with her unconscious mind instead of focusing upon the logical conscious level.

To communicate with the unconscious, Speed Seduction uses embedded commands - ambiguous and hidden phrases within everyday communication that the listener does not consciously perceive. Another Speed Seduction technique is anchoring, anchoring means guiding a person towards associating an emotional state (attraction, desire) with you. This is achieved through touch, spatial anchoring or more simply through the use of voice tonality.

There are a wide range of other techniques in Speed Seduction and entire patterns of language designed to result in the outcome that you desire.

Are You A Bad Date Magnet? Start Attracting Soulmates, And Avoid Bad Dates


Let's face it: you want to fall in love with someone who will love you back. You're tired of being alone every night – especially every weekend. You're sick and tired of magnetically attracting bad dates that seem to go on forever. You're ready to meet a soulmate for a long-term relationship, but instead you believe you can't attract the partner you deserve.

You keep meeting people who are all wrong for you, or you get dumped and dumped again. Feel like you're stuck in a rut, dating the same type of person over and over? Find yourself alone all the time? Feel scared and nervous before every date? The good news is, you don't have to spend any more time alone. And you can put an end to those miserable dates that lead nowhere. You'll begin enjoying fun dates with terrific people who have the potential to become your soulmate.

Here is a simple tip that will assist you before you get stuck for an easy way out. A first date should always be set up with an easy exit built in, and don't go out to dinner on a first date. Being trapped over a few courses can be painful. Just agree on a lunchtime date or after work coffee, or a drink. Just 1 drink is best. VERY IMPORTANT.

Let them know ahead of time that this date will have to be quick because you have to be somewhere else afterward, maybe someone's going away party, birthday, etc. You get the idea. If things go VERY well- you can extend the lunch or arrange an evening to dinner. And don't forget to cancel on your fake going away party or commitment with a discrete phone call! If the date is a downer- you look at your watch and simply say "Hey, it was nice to meet you! I have to go NOW” No buts or drawn out explanations, it's imperative you leave.

You have already set up your quick exit as part of the coffee/drinks/whatever deal you made. Didn't you? Lunchtime meetings make it extra easy to leave, simply because you HAVE to get back to work! Bottom line, first dates should always be as short as you can make them, you don't want to generate interest that you can't or won't reciprocate. However, if that person is worth more time investment, that can be date two! • Dorothy Parker: Love is like quicksilver in the hand. Leave the fingers open and it stays. Clutch it, and it darts away.

Are You A Bad Date Magnet? Start Attracting Soulmates, And Avoid Bad Dates

Let's face it: you want to fall in love with someone who will love you back. You're tired of being alone every night – especially every weekend. You're sick and tired of magnetically attracting bad dates that seem to go on forever. You're ready to meet a soulmate for a long-term relationship, but instead you believe you can't attract the partner you deserve.

You keep meeting people who are all wrong for you, or you get dumped and dumped again. Feel like you're stuck in a rut, dating the same type of person over and over? Find yourself alone all the time? Feel scared and nervous before every date? The good news is, you don't have to spend any more time alone. And you can put an end to those miserable dates that lead nowhere. You'll begin enjoying fun dates with terrific people who have the potential to become your soulmate.

Here is a simple tip that will assist you before you get stuck for an easy way out. A first date should always be set up with an easy exit built in, and don't go out to dinner on a first date. Being trapped over a few courses can be painful. Just agree on a lunchtime date or after work coffee, or a drink. Just 1 drink is best. VERY IMPORTANT.

Let them know ahead of time that this date will have to be quick because you have to be somewhere else afterward, maybe someone's going away party, birthday, etc. You get the idea. If things go VERY well- you can extend the lunch or arrange an evening to dinner. And don't forget to cancel on your fake going away party or commitment with a discrete phone call! If the date is a downer- you look at your watch and simply say "Hey, it was nice to meet you! I have to go NOW” No buts or drawn out explanations, it's imperative you leave.

You have already set up your quick exit as part of the coffee/drinks/whatever deal you made. Didn't you? Lunchtime meetings make it extra easy to leave, simply because you HAVE to get back to work! Bottom line, first dates should always be as short as you can make them, you don't want to generate interest that you can't or won't reciprocate. However, if that person is worth more time investment, that can be date two! • Dorothy Parker: Love is like quicksilver in the hand. Leave the fingers open and it stays. Clutch it, and it darts away.

The Introvert's Guide To Success At Bars And Clubs

When it comes to dating advice for guys, how many times have we heard about the importance of being the “alpha” man in a room full of people? After all, women are magically drawn to confidence and leadership, aren’t they? And a charismatic personality is generally understood to kick the attraction potential into hyperdrive. Right?

So we as men are bombarded with continuous tips and tricks on how to stand out. Attraction appears to be predicated upon learning to “banter” and be a “storyteller”. There are even books devoted to how to make women laugh. And if you have the personality to carry all of this, there’s no question it’s powerful stuff.

But there’s a problem. Not everyone has the same personality type, do they? As long as there yet exists a “strong silent type” persona that carries archetypal mystique in the imaginations of certain women, the reality shall remain that there just isn’t a blanket solution when it comes to identifying one single and all-conquering “type” that is sure to attract “all women”. To illustrate this further, consider how “cocky/funny” is powerfully effective stuff…but only with women who find it, well, powerfully effective. Some very attractive women just don’t resonate with it for whatever reason. That’s life.

But wait a minute.
How then is the “Strong Silent Guy” supposed to “stand out” in the loud, flamboyant world of “night time game”-- where “larger than life” rules--if he isn’t up to the “peacocking” challenge? The truth is a guy with an introverted personality may have incredible potential for igniting attraction in certain women. But how can he effectively convey that in a bar full of people?

That’s a good question, and I’ve been asked it more than once within the past couple of weeks.

In offering a potential answer to it, let’s focus on a key scenario in a bar/club setting. Almost always, night time pick-up strategy begins with “opening a set”. This means having the flat-out confidence and energy to be a part of a larger group of people and TAKE CHARGE of it. The guy who controls the mood and the flow of a group of people (be they all women or mixed company) is the guy who is best positioned for creating attraction among the women of that group. This makes sense. Once you’ve mastered “working the crowd”, as the best stand-up comedians are known for, you can often find yourself in the envious position of taking your pick as to which woman you’d like to “single out” for a more private conversation.

Common wisdom says this requires a gregarious personality of the most outgoing sort.

Not so fast.

The most powerful boardroom chairmen--and indeed the most effective U.S. Presidents--tend to have something in common when it comes to group dynamics. And I believe that they have a valuable secret that introverted guys can learn from when it comes to winning over a room full of people.

Their secret is this: they are fantastic listeners. What’s more, they are equally adept at INVOLVING OTHERS and evaluating opinions.

John F. Kennedy in particular was known for being able to hold a group of high level dignitaries and/or cabinet members at absolute rapt attention. Bear in mind these groups were typically composed of men with immense egos. Yet, JFK actually said relatively little. Instead, he urged involvement from particular individuals at the table with him and paid full attention to their input. When any one person had completed his thought, he would quickly hand off the subject to someone else. Often he would enact the transition by simply asking another person to “continue the thought” or “offer his or her opinion”.

Invariably, the culmination of all this was a great desire on the part of those at the table to finally hear Kennedy’s word on the matter. Not once having elbowed his way into the conversation to exert his views, by the time he spoke all eyes were trained upon his and all ears were hanging on his every word.

A man of great character may be confident, masculine and very much a leader. But he may not be “the life of the party”. The untold truth, however, is that he can indeed emerge as the most overwhelmingly attractive man in the group at a bar or club…if he can do what JFK could.

Lead. Listen. Care. Earn respect and in the process you will have the full attention of some high-quality women.

Will this work always? Will it be effective everywhere? Nothing is…not even the more mainstream “game” tactics, right? But if you are an introverted man, what we’ve discussed here today is one serious and more “natural” alternative to a persona that doesn’t fit.

By the way, whatever your personality type, try JFK’s attitude on for size at work sometime. Watch your career gain forward mobility as a result.

Are You Scared To Ask Women Out? Get The Insider Secrets To Succeed


What is it about women which men find intimidating due to which they find it hard to ask them out? Well there are several external factors which might be stopping you from making a move and ask the woman of your dreams out. But the biggest factor you need to realize is inside you. It is basically what is inside you that counts and makes the difference in your life. Read on to discover how you can be bold enough to ask women out and get the desired response.

Attitude based on experience- Guys often find it hard to forget the past specially the one's who have had a bad past experience with women. They feel that only because someone dumped them in the past they would face rejection from almost every woman they ask out. So the first thing you need to do is to change this attitude into a turbo charged confident male who is willing to take risks and is not scared to face rejection.

Do you have the disease to please?
- Most guys want to be the epitome of perfection all the time and these are the one's who are able to ask women out but mostly get rejected. Women do not prefer guys who are always willing to please them and in order to do that end up crossing the line. Most guys don't even bother to make an effort thinking that they are not good pleasers and women might reject them. The fact of the matter is that women do no prefer guys who like to please them all the time rather they prefer guys with grit determination and who like to do their own thing. Therefore get this myth out of your brain that you have to be a good pleaser to ask a woman out.

She’s a girl not a ghost- Most guys are as scared of asking a woman out as they are of a real life ghost. She is just a human being pretty much like you and nothing special. She breathes the same oxygen just like you do. She goes through the same emotions as you do so there is nothing to be scared of. The major reason why guys are scared of asking a woman out is due to the fact that they put women on a higher scale than what they truly are and face inferiority complex.

Love yourself into life- Another reason why guys find it hard to ask a woman out is due to the fact that they do not love themselves rather seek love and acceptance from others. The best way to energize yourself into asking a woman out is to start loving yourself. When you love yourself it would free you from all sorts of fears and negative emotions and you would not be tentative when you would be willing to approach women.

How To Be A Player And Seduce Any Woman You Want


It is a common misconception that a woman does not want to get seduced. In the movie Hitch, the main protagonist who is a dating guru, mentioned that no woman wakes up saying "God, I hope I don't get swept off my feet today." This is very true. However, this doesn't mean that seduction is easy. But if you play your cards right and know what the true player knows, the game will stack in your favour.

So what does the player knows that the common man doesn't? I am about to reveal to you what I call the 'twin keys to seduction'. With these two keys, you are well on your way to s any woman you want.

The first key to seduction is control.

Being in control is the perhaps the most important trait seeked for by a woman in a man, either consciously or subconsciously. The player must never exert control in a forceful manner - rather he will need to do it subtlely. An easy way to do this is to balance out having control with forfeiting it - for example: "Yes, I will bring you out for drinks this Friday, but I will get to pick where we go to."

The second key to seduction is patience.

Look - you can never seduction any woman if you are not patient. The true player knows how to pace the process of seduction. The biggest mistake a man can make when seducing a woman is to move too fast. Remember this - women 'warms up' far slower than men. They will need to be paced throughout the interaction - if a man 'moves' any faster than what the woman is comfortable with, she is most likely to bail out.

The true player knows that the twin weapons of control and patience are the most deadly arsenal in his seduction toolkit. By projecting your gentlemanly traits confidently through carefully paced interaction is the sure way to seduce any woman you want.

Thursday, August 23, 2007

Important Conversation Tips for Your Personal and Professional Lives

Your personal and business environments may be very different, but the skills needed to communicate effectively are basically the same.

If you are attentive, informed, and a great listener, you can start a conversation with almost anyone in any situation.

1. If you need to improve your conversational skills in the workplace, look around at those who seem to continually advance in their profession.Notice how they speak with other employees, from the CEO to the janitor. A friendly smile, a firm handshake, and a confident attitude are generally common factors among those who are quickly moving up the corporate ladder.

By making a conscious effort to speak with everyone you encounter and displaying a friendly, self-assured attitude, you will project a successful image and make lasting impressions upon co-workers.

2. Your personal life is no different in that a positive outlook and friendly disposition will go a long way in improving your relationships with friends and family members.

Everyone you encounter, from your spouse to the clerk at your local convenience store will appreciate and respond favorably to a kind word and a smiling face.

By paying attention to the interests and activities of others, you will never lack for conversation. Ask about the other person's day, future plans, or any subject that you know is of interest to them.

You can easily converse with everyone you meet if you listen carefully and make a real effort to project a positive image.

3. If you want to always have plenty to say to co-workers and your employer, keep up to date on the latest developments in your particular field.

Read trade magazines, company literature, and search web sites. Having the ability to hold an intelligent conversation about your line of work will make you invaluable in your company and allow you to communicate effectively.

Be discreet and professional in your conversations with other employees. No supervisor will begrudge you a few moments of small talk now and then, but constant chatting and talking across the room to others is distracting and unprofessional.

Chat for a few minutes when your workload allows, but keep it quiet and courteous.

4. Courtesy, genuine interest, and a little preparation will give you an advantage in your ability to converse with others.

Make a mental note of things of interest that can be used to start a conversation and give you an edge in the workplace.

Current events, local politics, and the activities of others will always make good conversation starters whether at home or at the office.

Conversational tips include common courtesy, a positive attitude, and a little planning. If you observe a few simple rules, your communication skills will improve dramatically.

These conversation tips should be enough to get you started down the path of successful communication. The ability to carry on a conversation with very little effort is a learned skill that comes easier to some than others.

If you need to improve your conversational skills, practice these tips each day and pretty soon they will be habits that come naturally.

How to Be Irresistible to Women



1. Go out with another woman. If you’re going out to a club or a bar, take a female friend or your sister with you. Women are often more amenable to talking to men who are with other women. It gives them the feeling that you actually like women, and that’s attractive. If your female friend is outgoing, see if she’ll make small talk with somebody you’d like to meet. She can say something along the lines of, “I love your necklace!” and that should do it. After a little back-and-forth, your friend can say, “Oh, how rude of me. This is my friend Andy,” and you’re in business.

2. Look women in the eye.
It seems elementary, but you’d be surprised at how many guys either undress a woman with their eyes or avoid eye contact altogether. Women love it when you look them in the eye.

3. Don’t try to “buy” her. If you buy her a drink, she is obligated to say thank you and that’s it. If she accepts the drink, the polite thing for her to do would be to spend a little time talking to you, but that’s all. On the other hand, if a woman takes the drink and walks away, let her go. You wouldn’t want spend time with her, anyway. Trust me.

4. Find out her interests. Get her talking about what she’s crazy about, whether it’s David Bowie or the New York Mets. If you don’t get it, you can say something like, “You know, I’m not too familiar with Bowie. What CD would you recommend?” Or, “I’m more into football than baseball. What is it about baseball that you like?” Ask a woman her opinion, and you’ll have her eating out of your hand (we have more in common with guys than you think).

5. Listen more, talk less. Hey, I’m not suggesting that you let her do all the talking, but some guys meet a woman and then never shut up. Don’t try to impress her! Don’t brag about your GPA at Harvard, the Jag in your driveway, or the fact that you’re CEO of a tuna fish conglomerate. You’ll get precisely the kind of woman you don’t want, the one who’s only into you for your achievements and possessions, rather than for who you really are. Instead, ask questions and listen for the answers. Give your opinions. Get to know the woman. Let her get to know you.

6. Be optimistic. In other words, this is no time to discuss how oil prices are going through the roof, what a witch your ex-girlfriend was, or that your parents never gave you enough attention. If you run out of things to talk about, ask her if she’s seen the latest hit at the box office.

7. Be chaste. Do not try to go to bed with a woman right away. Sure, there’s a chance that if you go for it, she will, but if you’re hoping for a lasting relationship, you set up all sorts of weirdness if you “do it” too soon. Crazy as it sounds, if she sleeps with you, she may not respect you in the morning (you didn’t know that, did you?). She’ll figure that you get into bed with every woman you meet, which pretty much rules you out as boyfriend material. (Or she may be the type who thinks you owe her because she slept with you, which makes her really bad girlfriend material.) Save yourself undue angst and get to know a person before you go to bed with her.

8. Make a great exit. If you want to see her again, ask for her number (preface this with something casual, “Maybe we can get together some time.”). Then touch her shoulder (a little restraint is sexier here; don’t try to kiss her) and tell her you’ll be in touch. Then leave. If your friends aren’t ready to go yet, tell her you have to hang out with them. Walk away. The key here is to keep her wanting more.

9. Call her. If you said you were going to call, you can avoid looking desperate by waiting two days, but no longer. A plea on behalf of the female sex: If you’re not interested in a woman, do not—I repeat—do not say you’ll call. Say, “Nice meeting you,” and be on your way. Besides, collecting numbers to feed your ego is kind of sad.

10. Treat women as you’d have them treat you. The media have brainwashed us to believe that men come and women come different planets, but we’re all human. Some of the biggest losers in love are women who complain that all men are the same, they all want one thing, and so on. But it’s equally sad when a guy assumes all women are like his mother or his psychopathic ex-girlfriend. You’ll enjoy astonishing success with women if you understand two simple facts: We’re people. We’re more like you than you think.

Five Tips to Increase Your Likeability

While the listing below may seem to be cursory and easy to implement, they are not. It is difficult to make real and permanent changes in your personality. The process of becoming an exceptionally likeable individual takes years. Do not let that intimidate you, however. Remember: the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. Likeability, like drawing, writing or golf, is something which must be practiced.

1. Be positive.


The single most common problem facing individuals who want to become more popular/successful/likeable is their own attitude. Attitude is everything. Attitude is the reason why you aren’t as popular now as you want to be. More specifically, it is a negative attitude which can poison your relationships with your coworkers, and indeed the world. Developing a more positive attitude does not mean ignoring hardships or failures. It is simply reframing those difficulties and negative emotions to healthier positive ones. The old cliche, "When life gives you lemons, make lemonade," has been around for a while because it is exactly the winning attitude which people are attracted to, and it is exactly the attitude which brings rewards.

Why do you complain? Why do you have pet-peeves? What is the point of harboring all of these negative emotions? Be big enough to let them go. Use your rational mind and refuse to be overcome by these negative emotions. My pet peeve used to be people who had poor pronunciation. Like 'nuclular' instead of 'nuclear' or 'basttitized' instead of 'bastardized'. However, I realized that it really didn't matter how the person pronounces the word as long as I can understand the point they are making. I can fix their errors mentally. I know now that even I, yes even the great I, is prone to mispronounce a word once in a while as well. Instead of highlighting failures and differences try to build commonalities and connect with your peers.

"Don't be discouraged by a failure. It can be a positive experience. Failure is, in a sense, the highway to success, inasmuch as every discovery of what is false leads us to seek earnestly after what is true, and every fresh experience points out some form of error which we shall afterwards carefully avoid." - John Keats

2. Control your insecurities.


Insecurities oftentimes come leaping out of a person's brain and mouth so quickly that the speaker has no idea what words he just blurted out. People that always have to be correct are insecure. People that constantly saying "just kidding!" after every single joke are insecure. People that respond to a joke at their expense with anger or insult are insecure. Insecurity beguiles confidence and weakens your Self. Becoming a better individual means accepting your Self, and not hiding it under the veil of insults, "just kiddings", or factoids.

Either you accept mediocrity about your personality completely and without shame, or you change it. Period. If you're fat, either go on a strict diet and exercise regime or accept it and even be willing to poke fun at yourself. If you have a high voice, buy some tapes to help you improve your tone or be willing to not only accept but love your squeaky vocals. Display your faults for all the world to see - mistakes are unifying characteristics which all humans can empathize with. Not only is perfection limiting, it's boring as well. The mark of a mistake-free life is one which has not been fulfilled.

"The only man who never makes a mistake is the man who never does anything." - Theodore Roosevelt

3. Provide value.


The only thing worse than an insecure person is one who is so completely and utterly shutdown from the world that they refuse to display any personality at all. If you work in an IT company like I do, you know exactly what I mean. There are developers there who display exceptional intellect and foresight on their projects but when it comes to simple human interaction they lack the social graces (or *gasp*, bravery) to wish you a good morning. In order to be around people with value you must be able to convey value. There is no alternative. If you are humorless, read books on comedy writing; if you are boring, go out and do something adventurous. Experience life and share your findings with your coworkers.

Have you ever noticed that successful people often flock together? I have heard countless stories of brilliant scientists or businessmen who were close friends with other successful individuals before they gained their notoriety. In parallel, have you noticed that drug addicts and criminals often associate with each other? This isn't coincidence. You are the sum of all of your friends and close associates. Choose your friends with care, just because you grew up with someone does not mean you are forced to be their friend for the rest of your life. Start surrounding yourself with people of value and it will become a self-fulfilling prophesy.

"The art of being yourself at your best is the art of unfolding your personality into the person you want to be... Be gentle with yourself, learn to love yourself, to forgive yourself, for only as we have the right attitude toward ourselves can we have the right attitude toward others." - Wilfred Peterson

4. Eliminate all judgments.


Judgmental people are usually easy to spot because they are the ones eating alone in the lunch room. They think of themselves as 'too [flattering adjective]' to have lunch with those guys in shipping and 'too [unflattering adjective]' to eat with the guys in IT. No one is above you and no one is below you. We are all mammals - humans, more distinctly - just trying to get by the best way we know how. Do not believe for a second that there are unwritten 'leagues' or 'classes' which people must adhere to. All of these boundaries are artificial, put in place by people who are in desperate need for justifications of their own failures. No judgments means treating everyone with the respect you would give to a 120-year-old man and the understanding you would give toward your seven-year-old cousin.

"Beginning today, treat everyone you meet as if they were going to be dead by midnight. Extend them all the care, kindness and understanding you can muster. Your life will never be the same again." - Og Mandino

5. Become a person of conviction.


In order to gain respect you must start respecting yourself first. You must set boundaries on behavior and let people know that you are not a pushover. Make no mistake, people will test you in order to find out exactly where your boundaries are. This means saying 'no' to disrespect and letting the offending party know that he or she crossed the line with their comment and you did not appreciate it. People will respect you more when they realize that you are not someone who is malleable or valueless.

Set your own personal unbreakable code of ethics. Make it as rigid as your morals will allow. When you are faced with an ethical dilemma, reference this code. If no precedent exists, create one. Let it be your ever-expanded guide which will provide you stability in an otherwise chaotic world. If your boss requests you to do something that is in incongruence with your core values, simply refuse and explain your reasoning. You may be surprised how understanding they might be.

"One needs to be slow to form convictions, but once formed they must be defended against the heaviest odds." - Mahatma Gandhi

Wednesday, August 22, 2007

3 simple strategies to G.A.S. up your attraction Quotient

Do you feel that the Law of Attraction is working
against you?

Simply speaking the Law of Attraction is really about your ability to use your internal thoughts to get to where you want to go. However thinking is only one part of this dynamic law.

How do you get to where you want to go? For most people it is turning their dreams into goals and then achieving those goals. Some people are fortunate in that they have internalized a proven goal setting process reinforced with proven goal setting tools. However, for most people that is not the case.

Think to all those New Year Resolutions that you have accumulated during the last decade. How many of those resolutions or goals do you achieve? Research suggests that most people give them up within 30 days. Yes, people set goals, but far few actually achieve them.

While your thinking, think about your attitudes or those habits of thoughts that you have day in and day out. From my experiences, I believe most people will embrace misery over joy and scarcity over abundance. The Don�t Attitudes of Life far exceed the Do Attitudes. Positive attitudes are in short supply.

To attract people means that you must strong interpersonal skills. These skills are what I call Self Leadership Skills. The ability to lead yourself first will later allow you to lead others. People are attracted to leaders who consistently achieve their goals or get results while maintaining positive attitudes.

When you build the capacities of Goals, Attitudes and Self Leadership skills, you will definitely see an increase in positive results from the Law of Attraction.

For more powerful attraction secrets send us your e mail at Vic_ppl@yahoo.com